Monday, July 21, 2008

Who's Laughing Now?


I need to shop for work clothes, but I don’t want to. On my days off I don’t think about work, so I don’t think about shopping for work. Each morning while choosing my attire for the day, I regret not shopping the day before. Today however, I pulled out a pair of Old Navy khakis and wondered why I hadn’t worn them for a while. “Who cares?“ I thought, as a little wave of joy passed through me, "I'm gonna be sportin' a new look today". I ironed them with perfect creases and excitedly put them on. I walked up to the mirror and then it hit me – the reason I never wear them - the unattractive hug in the buttock area. They feel comfortable enough, but they hold on to the butt skin a little too tight. Feeling frustrated – I resign myself to wearing the same pants I wore last week.

And then, the light bulb moment happened.

I raced to the closet and pulled out two t-shirts. I folded up the first one and stuffed in down the right backside of my pants. Then I did the same thing with the other t-shirt on the left side. My pants were cotton, so I figured they just needed a little encouragement to stretch out. I walked around like this for about five minutes while I continued getting ready. When I finally walked past a mirror again, I did a double take. All I could think was, “I like big butts and I cannot lie…..” (That’s the only line I know from the song) Suddenly feeling ridiculous, I quickly pulled the shirts out of my trousers. But then, as I looked in the mirror again, I realized, “IT WORKED!” Sure, it was a silly way to stretch out my pants, but it’s hard to argue with results. As proud as I was of myself and my brilliant idea, I still felt like there was room for improvement. So, I repacked the trousers with the shirts and added a second step to the process – squats. I figured a healthy set of 25 squats would add just enough tension to the cotton for better stretch results, and I was right! Ha!

I may have looked a little ridiculous this morning, but I looked good ALLL day long, so who’s laughing now?

5 comments:

M, J, B, G, Sam & Sadie said...

Oh My Gosh! I haven't read anything that funny or entertaining in a while!! You're MY kinda girl! I'm ALL about doing sqauts in the pants. Hey...if they don't "require" squats...they're probably too loose! ha ha But really, I can't stand saggy bottoms at the end of the day...so you gotta start off just a bit on the tighter side. Great post! Found you through Kuckie...will definitely be back!

Claire said...

I am still laughing - just from the photo alone - because when I got to your site I was looking at the photo and thinking "what is she doing" - I love the story - you're keeping us laughing!

Kuckie said...

NO. WAY. After all these years, I STILL cannot believe some of the stuff you come up with...And this is why I love you!!! PRICELESS!!

kc said...

As soon as I saw that picture I thought "I like big butts and I cannot lie", and then when I read that line in your post I cracked up laughing! Very funny post, and a great idea! :)

by Sheri said...

I'm glad you laughed! :)